What happens in your first counselling session?
Most people are nervous about starting counselling. Here’s what really happens in a first session, from what you’ll talk about to how you might feel afterwards.
If you’re thinking about counselling but haven’t booked a session yet, there’s a good chance the not-knowing is part of what’s stopping you. What will I say? What if I don’t know where to start? What if I cry, or say nothing at all?
These are completely normal questions. So, here’s what happens.
Before we meet
We’ll usually have a free 30-minute discovery call first. It’s a relaxed chat where you can tell me a bit about what’s going on, ask anything you like, and see whether I feel like the right person for you. There’s no obligation to book anything afterwards.
If you decide to go ahead, I’ll send you a short contract. It covers practical things like confidentiality, cancellations and payment, so there are no surprises. Then it’s just a case of choosing a time, and either joining online from wherever you’re comfortable or coming to see me in person in Monmouth.
The session itself
Sessions last 50 minutes. At the start, I’ll go over confidentiality with you, including the few situations where I might need to share something. That way you know exactly where you stand before you tell me anything.
After that, the time is yours. You don’t need a prepared speech or a neat explanation. Some people arrive knowing exactly what they want to talk about. Others start with “I’m not really sure why I’m here,” which is a perfectly good place to begin.
I might ask a few questions to understand what’s brought you here and what you’d like to be different. But you decide how much you share and how fast. Nothing is too small, too messy, or too complicated to bring.
If there are silences, that’s fine. If there are tears, that’s fine too. I have tissues.
What counselling isn’t
It isn’t me telling you what to do, judging your choices, or giving you homework you’ll feel guilty about not doing. It’s also not a test you can fail. There’s no right way to “do” counselling.
Afterwards
People feel all sorts of things after a first session. Lighter, tired, a bit stirred up, or relieved to have finally said something out loud. All of that is normal. It’s worth trying to have some time to yourself after the session if you can.
Then you decide whether to carry on. Some people come for a handful of sessions, some for longer. Either is fine.
If you’re still unsure
That’s okay. Booking a discovery call doesn’t commit you to anything. It’s just a conversation, and often the hardest part is sending that first message.
